On the 101st post on the Tirade, I'll be throwing down the hammer on my favorite 25 albums of the decade. A lot of you guys sent in your emails, letters and made threatening remarks regarding my film choices, but you can't argue with emotion, suckers!
It's extremely important to know that these albums are not the "25 BEST."
If I wanted to make a list of the BEST albums of the decade, I think I'd need a solid month to do nothing but cage myself in my room with an iPod packed with music that the media tells me is good and try my best to decipher what's actually worth a damn.
Plus, I'm not a music surgeon or some kind of enthusiast. Hell no, I don't even play an instrument. I'd have no idea what even qualifies or by what criteria to judge a "BEST" album. The pieces you see below are just my favorite pieces that I've collected over the years that have been my faithful companions through thick and thin.
These are my FAVORITES.
My ranking method is actually based on time spent with each album, how it touched me in some way at some point in my life, how I used it to lift myself up amidst some crisis, how it comforted me in weird situations and how it motivated me to either get work done, kick ass, physically move something, run, stab, hike, love, yell, sleep or get away. You know what I mean. I'm sure you can think of 10,000 other reasons to listen to some song.
The point is, these albums are personal. This ranking isn't for the Billboard Music Charts, Rolling Stone magazine or even you. This is just what I dig.
Enjoy it.
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25. North Mississippi Allstars | Shake Hands With Shorty | 2 0 0 0
Thank you, Chris Pickey. I picked up this album from you at the DNJ and wore it completely out that year. I think it kept me sane amongst some of the most hilarious newspaper office moments in the history of my career.
Shake Hands With Shorty has this awesome sound that reminds me so much of the times in college when my buddies and I would sit around playing music for our (immediately cancelled) public access TV show. I never could afford drums, so I just busted out a bunch of buckets and beat the living hell out of 'em like some Las Vegas "Stomp" show. Except instead of nice big trash cans and stuff, I just stole the buckets my dad used to fill up his coonhounds' water bowls.
This album totally captures that spirit of fun music making; you can tell these guys laughed it up while recording this. Hell, they might have even used some buckets too. You never know, and neither do I. I don't stalk these guys, how should I know?
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24. N.E.R.D. | In Search Of | 2 0 0 2
By the recommendation of Tommy Forrester, I dove right in to this piece of hilarity. Do you take it seriously? Do you even care? "Am I High" is worth the price of the album download. While I think the "Lapdance" song is a bit overrated, I stick to my "Bobby James" guns and realize I'm just one hit away from being passed out.
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23. Rebel Son | Declaration of Disaffection | 2 0 0 7
Tip of the hat to Jared McClane here. When he introduced me to this band this year, my perceptions were shattered and my life suddenly changed for the better. This could be one of the funniest albums I've ever heard in my entire life and a true representation of a modern, take-no-shit man's man country philosophy.
While their best tracks are scattered throughout their entire album discography, this piece in particular has some of my very favorite songs. I encourage you to click the button above and listen to their "medley" MP3 file on their site.
It could also be one of the most self-aware post-break-up honky tonk albums ever made. This is the kind of music you listen to right before a really massive bar fight. With knives and concrete cinder blocks. But in the end, everybody would just stop and laugh, because life is awesome.
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22. French Kicks | Swimming | 2 0 0 8
Ah man, this is the kind of album that I throw in when driving around really curvy roads and/or straight ones. Of all these albums, this one is the most fun for driving and singing way off key. The high-energy percussion and weird ass melodic arrangements give you no choice but to hum or sing along, and even if you have no idea what's being said, you sing anyway.
Luckily when the windows are rolled down (summertime, please) nobody (especially you) can tell how horrible you sound. For example, there's a wonderful moment in the first track, Abandon,—right at the top of the build—where you have a wide-open license to just scream "AAAAAAHHHHHHAAAHHAAAA" and it really, really feels good.
It'll feel especially good to the poor bastard sitting next to you in the passenger's seat.
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21. Loretta Lynn | Van Lear Rose | 2 0 0 4
Oh Loretta, why are you so amazing? Sure, all these folks point at this album and look over at some big tree that Jack White is hiding behind. He's probably waving back there a little bit, but even that fool will tell you that Loretta's the one with the goods. A gorgeous lady with a gorgeous voice... her songs have a really weird way of sneaking into your brain and just making everything connect. Especially if you happen to be from the country, and I sure as hell am. It's really ironic that this is probably one of the only true country albums released in 10 years and it was produced by a blues-lovin' rock and roll mastermind. I got no complaints. This is a beautiful piece of work.
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20. Justin Timberlake | FutureSex / LoveSounds | 2 0 0 6
No, this isn't a typo. Timberlake is the real deal. Beautiful women love to dance to this album and I love to dance with beautiful women who love to dance to this album. I should actually be writing this guy thank you letters for some of the best parties I've had— this side of the damn decade. (That's right awesome 2007 Halloween party. I'm not forgetting you.)
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19. Thrice | The Alchemy Index Vols. 1 & 2 Fire and Water | 2 0 0 7
As concept albums go with pretty cool concepts, this album has me sold like a delicious bass at a fish market. The first half? Fiery tracks that make you want to light up some Molotov cocktail and throw it through one of your enemy's headquarters. The second half? Songs that put you in a trance state of total euphoria and sooth you like cold water after working some landscaping job for 10 hours straight in the desert. Any album that takes you on a journey from a lethal microwave to a Gilette aftershave commercial is a-okay by me.
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18. Mos Def | The New Danger | 2 0 0 4
This man continues to take hip hop to higher and more awesome levels. When this album landed in my lap in 2004, I was going through some major life changes. This man's transition from your typical "bounce-up-and-down" beats to "pumping your fist and smashing out car windows before making sweet love to your girlfriend" sound just blew my mind and perfectly synced up with my life at the time. "Sex, Love & Money" must have been the theme song on my iPod for three months straight. (Key track, however: "Ghetto Rock." Unbelievable.)
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17. Apollo Up! | Chariots of Fire | 2 0 0 6
I bought this album on its release to support my buddy Jay Phillips because I've always been a huge fan of Jay first and his music second. What I didn't quite expect, however, was how unbelievably good this damn thing is. This thing is good. It's been interesting for me to see Jay go from a guy who had a real passion for all things music to a f'n nuclear bomb of talent. Not long after I'd been listening to it, I'd completely forgotten that it was my old buddy Jay who was singing. The album went way beyond "my friend's band" to "this is one of my favorite albums of the entire damn decade because it rocks my freakin' socks off." I could be biased, but I'm not. This thing is good.
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16. Taking Back Sunday | Where You Want To Be | 2 0 0 4
Going through some weird, dramatic break up or severing ties to someone close is a big fried pan of shit pulled straight out of an oven and seasoned with 100 tablespoons of hell. I sure went through one of those cooking sessions in 2004, and this album probably saved my life on more than one occasion.
Uh huh. This album. Shut up.
Anyway, I could always, in some strange way, identify with any and all of the weird situations and emotional statuses that these guys sing about. I know that doesn't sound too technical, but I'm not kidding. In a way, these weird complicated aggressive songs would make me feel better about anything I was dealing with at the time. They weren't close enough to me to pull out a hard response, but they were relatable and fun. (Key track: "I Am Fred Astaire")
I will stand up on some tree stump to lobby against this album being labelled as "emo." Man, it just doesn't go all the way. It's got some emotion flying out of it like a blender with no lid on, but it holds it together with no suicidal tendencies. That's good enough for me. This ain't no "Chemical Romance" or whatever.
Whatever that is.
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15. Pete Yorn | Musicforthemorningafter | 2 0 0 1
In my opinion, this album is seriously appropriately titled. It's one of those rare collections that I can just sit and listen to from beginning to the end without a single hold up, sour face or disinterest... and it always sounds the best -post some weird situation or stupid encounter. In a really weird way, this album has kind of served as my toolbox for the decade. I can always reach in this thing and pull out something that'll help me fix a problem. Thanks, Pete, for helping me with that sink problem. Also for that awesome video where you run all over the city like a maniac.
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14. Sufjan Stevens | Illinoise | 2 0 0 5
The first time I listened to this album in full, my exact reaction (and I do believe I said this out loud in the CityView Magazine basement in 2006) was, "What in the hell IS this shit???"
All the critics say it's the best album ever made, or of the decade, or something. If you want to put your trust in those guys, it's up to you. I'd probably say they're right, though. Sufjan opened up a big window for me, and it was called, "They Are Night Zombies!! They Are Neighbors!! They Have Come Back From the Dead!!! Aaahhh!!"
After hearing that song, I was sold. Suddenly I understood exactly what this maniac was doing. I went back and listened again... and then again.. and pretty soon I was totally in love. I really wish that stupid Little Miss Sunshine movie hadn't stolen one of his cooler tracks for itself, though. Now every time I hear that fantastic song I just picture that bus or sunshine or some little girl or Greg Kinnear or something.
At the end of the day, this really is one of the most innovate, creative and batshit in-sane pieces of music ever produced, and it hypnotized me like one of Biggie Smalls' video hoes.
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13. Wolf Parade | Apologies to Queen Mary | 2 0 0 5
Every time I hear a song from this album it feels like I'm opening up a big energy drink can and slamming the hell out of it. But it doesn't stop there. From out of the can comes all these really cool colors and they're carrying a bunch of stuff I love. I see Arnold Schwarzenegger riding a unicycle with a jacket covered in sequins, a polar bear with a shotgun and a leather biker jacket, some steak, a really fast moving bullet train on fire and some mystery woman in a Zorro mask with this big beautiful smile carrying the entire Friday the 13th boxed set collection.
Basically, this album is everything I love. It's packed with energy, excitement and fun... and I've managed to keep it disassociated from a single person, place or thing that would otherwise taint it and take my mind off how creative the music actually is. I love those crazy Canadians.
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12. Alexisonfire | Crisis | 2 0 0 6
I'll be honest with you here, I just discovered this album in 2007 and it hasn't been far away from my CD player or iTunes for more than a week at a time. This thing just stands tall. For my part, the experience of listening to this band is like going in a boxing ring with Kimbo Slice and Mandy Moore. On one hand you have this terrifying monster of a man who could rip your arms off and use them as toothpicks... and on the other side there's this gorgeous woman who you want to take to dinner, cuddle up with next to some fire and then read some kind of poetry with before getting it on while listening to some Al Green song.
Unfortunately, you won't get to first base before Slice catches you by surprise and breaks your jaw in two like a fortune cookie. Is the whole experience disorienting and/or sometimes exhausting? Sure. Is it worth it? Lord yes.
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11. The White Stripes | Elephant | 2 0 0 3
Look, there's not a whole ton I can say about this album here that you don't already know. It's loud, it's quiet, it's powerful and it's delicate. You can sit down to listen and suddenly realize that you've been listening for the past five hours and it's been looping over and over again. "But what happened?" you'll ask. I'll tell you what happened. You totally blacked out for five hours. You wanna know what happened while you were out? A five-hour-long orgasm.
Followed abruptly by the ghost of Ed McMahon rushing into the room to give you your check for 10 million dollars. And he's riding on a magic carpet wearing a badass Harley Davidson helmet.
Anyway, this album is really, really good.
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10. Deftones | White Pony | 2 0 0 0
I remember the very second I put this album into the CD player in 2000.
It wasn't my car, though. It belonged to the woman I was crazy in love with. It was a maroon car, which was awesome at the time. We rolled down the windows and let this amazing ocean breeze blow through one window to the next while driving down a road running parallel to the Atlantic Ocean, all the while blasting the hell out of this album.
It was late at night, but there were still lights shining and reflecting across the hood of the car and through the windshield. I remember closing my eyes and hearing the pounding drums of "Digital Bath" while a voice that screamed "And tonight.... I feel like more" came crashing into my head and across my body like a tidal wave. Goosebumps on my arms and salt in the wind. My hair being tossed around in 40 directions. A beautiful human being sitting beside me with a smile on her face.
I knew while I was experiencing that moment that I'd always remember it, and every time I hear this album I think of those moments of total exhilaration. Dreams aren't laid out that well.
It could be slightly ironic, I suppose—considering this album is extremely violent, relentless and provoking... but so is every Friday the 13th movie ever made... and they bring me more comfort than a heating blanket in a snow storm. Don't knock it until you try it.
Maybe you should just listen to the infamous 911-knife-attack-phone-call track, "Knife Party," crank it up to level 11 and set the sleep timer.
Also a winner: "Passenger." That's the part of the album where Maynard James Keenan teaches Chino Moreno how to sing properly.
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9. Fleet Foxes | Fleet Foxes | 2 0 0 8
This is a stunning album. In fact, you could stop what you're doing and grab the nearest thesaurus. Look up the word "beautiful" and list out every single synonym you can find... after a few paragraphs and bathroom breaks, you'll have slightly pegged how amazing I think this piece is. It's the stuff of magic, and even though I sound like one of those LARP guy weirdos when I say that, I really do mean it. Because it is.
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8. Talib Kweli | Quality | 2 0 0 2
Just pure hip hop at its finest moments ever. This guy's energy is off the scale. Every track flows together so well that's laid out exactly like an impressionistic painting. Up close it's this wonderful mix of beats and sounds all over the map. You get back and look at the total package and it all makes total sense. It's a perfect blend.
I mentioned the energy, but I'll mention it again right here in case you weren't paying attention. Each track is freakin' loaded with positive vibes and inspiring lines. Tracks like "Get by" and "Rush" are billboards for awesome, and try to not smile while listening to Kweli with Mos Def on "Joy." If you don't think that's a gorgeous song, you don't even have human organs. Where are you from, anyway?
You should go get in the "I don't have a soul" line and get your license to go straight to hell.
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7. Elliott Smith | New Moon | 2 0 0 7
In my opinion, this is as close we get to mid-to-late 90's vintage Elliott Smith. While nothing on earth comes close to touching his core era, this resurrected album can still easily bring a tear to my eye and a punch in my gut. Everybody knows that Smith had an extremely interesting perspective on life and songs like "Placeholder," "Going Nowhere" and "Almost Over" pull me into his world like a deadly pit of quicksand.
The revisitation of "Miss Misery" is absolutely amazing. It's almost like re-watching a movie and seeing things you didn't notice on the first round. Sometimes I'll be at work with the headphones in, and the song "Thirteen" will pop up. It's an emotional rampage as I try to pull myself away from memories of the 8th grade dance and the feeling of 100% naive, unchecked and reckless love while holding some chick's hand on the school bus.
Stop making fun of me, dammit, I'm an emotional guy.
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6. Thursday | Full Collapse | 2 0 0 1
So I'd just moved into my new home on the Sheep Farm in Lascassas, Tennessee, when a new friend of mine put this album in my hand. I guess it was the first time I'd really took a serious listen to the post-hardcore-crawling-into-deadly-emo-land territory music. For me, it was interesting and intense, and it gave me something new to latch on to and explore throughout my new experiences in a new city.
Also an important element for it being in my Top 10... this was the album in my CD player the day of the September 11th attack on New York City. I was rotating this record with the #2 album on my list during that entire time period, and it's really weird how you remember that stuff. The kind of loud, thunderous emotion that came banging out of this album was actually really cathartic for me. It was a weird time and it seemed to call for weird music.
However, the more time I spent with this band, the more I came to realize that these guys can transform into the Incredible Hulk when you're not paying attention and pummel the living life out of you.
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5. Atmosphere | Seven's Travels | 2 0 0 3
Atmosphere's Slug is one of the best lyricists on the planet Earth. Seriously, he just is. Dial that in on your radar and go there for your next vacation. He's the king of one-liners. His style is incredibly smooth, and it's absolutely amazing how his words flow together so seamlessly and seemingly effortlessly.
"Hello ma'am, would you be interested in some sexual positions and emotional investments? See, I'm not insane... in fact I'm kinda rational. When I be askin, yo, where did all the passion go?"
"God Bless America, but she stole the "B" from Bless."
"I gotta journey the world in a hurry, 'cause my attorney didn't put enough girls on the jury."
"I'm returning this Bleeding Hearts Club membership card, 'cause I want no mother fucking part of it."
"I wanna keep a clear sky and fly away like a meteor out of here, maybe next year I'll reappear."
"When I let them carry me to the cemetery I wanna be buried with a pocket full of clarity."
"I walk past with a nod and a reminisce, swear to God, hip hop and comic books were my genesis."
It was incredibly hard to nail down one favorite Atmosphere album for this list, because over the years I've collected my favorite tracks from multiple albums and made myself a series of mix CDs with nothing but Atmosphere music. It would take a mean sumbitch to take 'em away from me. If you get any ideas about trying anything you should know that I play for keeps.
I love Seven's Travels for the track "Always Coming Back Home to You," which is one of the more beautiful, true and powerful hip hop songs I've heard in my entire life.
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4. A Perfect Circle | Thirteenth Step | 2 0 0 3
Man this one came out of nowhere. Aside from being a near perfect collection of songs, this album helps me carry an entire set of awesome memories from the time I lived in Murfreesboro. I remember being at Matt Mitchell's house with this album cranked up to level 100, slamming cold beers and letting his Pit Bull drool all over me. As weird as that sounds, it was heaven in retrospect.
It's a perfect mix of everything I love in a rock and roll album. "The Package" comes tip toeing in the room when you've got your back turned... "Weak and Powerless" casually says hello, but in a very authoritative way. From "The Noose" to "The Nurse Who Loved Me," the album settles in, grabs a beer, puts its feet up on the coffee table and starts making some damn good conversation.
Suddenly, and without warning, "Pet" comes on and it turns your entire living room into shit. I'm saying that will rip up your grandmother's drapes, set your couch on fire, take your entire DVD collection outside with a shovel and bury it six feet under, take a bat to your mom's lava lamp and steal all your collector's edition beer coasters. It'll run out the door too... to savagely saw down some trees in your front yard... but before it leaves, it'll sing a nice "Lullaby" and bow out like one of those Von Trapp singer kids from The Sound of Music.
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3. Ryan Adams | Heartbreaker | 2 0 0 0
Ryan Adams is just an amazing songwriter. I'm not really sure what else I'm supposed to write here. He's been one of my very favorite artists of this entire decade because his range is so dynamic and his creativity is just off the chart. There's at least one or two songs on every single album he's put out that I'm just head over heels in love with.
If those songs were a woman, well, yeah, you know.
While he dug in and did his thing with Whiskeytown, this is the one that did the job. This album has such a grit to it with this amazing link between solid old school country and good 'ole rock and roll. While his styles and influences changed around from pop rock to near folk, he's always kept that same touching element that electrifies... while soothing you out, bud.
Editor's note: Plus, the guy married Mandy Moore, and yes, that's the second time she's popped up on this list. I swear it wasn't a conscious decision, but sometimes these things happen. Call the crush police, cuff me and book me, baby. I plead guilty on this one.
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2. Radiohead | Kid A | 2 0 0 0
What the hell kind of masterpiece is this? Throughout this list I've written stupid quips about these albums, usually violently comparing them to some force of belligerence. Not here, man. No, this thing is in its own league. Yeah, so OK Computer was one of the best albums of all time, sure... then they follow THAT thing up with this? I'm not sure I understood it at the time or could wrap my brain around it, but I couldn't get it out of my CD player.
I listened to it quite regularly through the aftermath of September 11, 2001, especially after all those weird rumors kept popping up about it being some insane prediction soundtrack for the entire affair. Chuck Klosterman's piece on this weird phenomenon is actually extremely interesting albeit terrifying.
What is it that makes it so different and powerful? Sure, it's a ballsy and brash movement that an infamous and amazing rock and roll band took towards total electronica, and I adore change... but I'm not sure that's what makes me love it so much. The energy is exploding from these tracks... even though it's completely soaked in lethargy. It's pulse pounding, exciting, mood bending and completely mystifying.
Maybe it's the logo?
Maybe I love it just because.
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1. Beck | Sea Change | 2 0 0 2
An album that just fits my decade. The past 10 years have been about changing, learning and repairing myself through trial and error, just like this album. It's magnificently touching because it's just so incredibly raw and honest. It's almost like Beck went to see this amazing therapist for a six hour session and he took us with him.
When I bought this thing in 2002, I would have no idea how valuable it would become for me throughout the next eight years. With so many failed relationships swirling around in a crystal ball, it really wouldn't be a shock if I made up a lie that I bought this album from some crazy old gypsy woman who predicted my future using my stolen wallet and some nearby store signage. If I had made that purchase based on her advice, I would go back there today and give her a hug.
To say that listening to these songs is some type of therapy would be a miss. This album is the melancholy of it all... the turning, dull edge of a knife cutting its way in there to find the spot that hurts the most. But through that honest pain comes a wonderful new perspective and a more broad way of thinking.
Maybe it is therapy after all? Or maybe it's just a guy who had a rough couple of years and wanted to tell us about it. Maybe it was a warning... a giant pile of yoga mats, cardboard boxes and inflatable pool floats waiting on my eventual fall from a 10-story building.
Or maybe it's something else. Maybe it's a good friend patting you on the back, letting you know that everything will be just fine.
Because it already is.
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Hope you fools enjoyed my big list rampage. There'll be more on the way, but we have to get through all that Christmas jazz first.
To everybody reading... have a wonderful set of holidays... you get nothing but love from The Tirade.
All the best in the whole world,
-Mr. McClane
P.S. I'll leave you with my very favorite music video of the entire decade. Enjoy!
1 Comments:
wow, our top 2 is the same!--tf3
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