Next, on an all-new episode of The Tirade: Captured deep inside enemy headquarters, McClane has no choice but to team up with his arch-enemy hot dog salesman to escape the clutches of Dr. Destructo and his army of radioactive ninjas!!!! Tune in to the next paragraph to find out how he'll make it out of this one!!!
--------------
Sorry suckers, that whole first paragraph was just a clever ruse, and I'm not in anybody's clutches. Take a second here to breathe and relax. Seriously, I'm okay.
Today I plan on taking the Tirade down to a local level. Typically I don't write a whole ton about Knoxville, since I'm still trying to keep my location secret from the biker gang that's been trying to kill me for years. (I accidentally turned their bikes over by awkwardly yawning and stretching out my arms in front of their bar in 1999.)
Yes, guys, I do live in Knoxville now, and I've been taking a ton of Judo classes, in case you plan on meeting me in some back alley behind Market Square.
Anyway, back to the point... somehow... Knoxville has been a pretty fantastic place to live. I've been really blessed to meet some amazing people here and do some amazing things. I really stand up for my city, and I'm proud of the ways it's evolving and changing.
Tonight I stopped by a Chamber of Commerce networking event and met all kinds of interesting people. Man, networking is hilarious! You can wonder through the crowd, literally smash into somebody's back... only to find out that this guy is the president of some awesome company and you've spilled some beer all down the back of his suit. (Luckily the guy grew up on a dairy farm too, so we didn't have to fight outside behind the dumpster. Instead we just swapped some jokes and talked about movies.)
I've been doing freelance design work from my apartment (a.k.a. "The Fortress of Solitude") for the last year, and I've recently realized that working from home has transformed me into a crazy person. I have no idea how this snuck up on me all of a sudden, but one morning I woke up and noticed that I'm going about this life thing all wrong.
I'm a people person. I love people. I love being around 'em, talking to 'em, making fun of 'em and most of all meeting them and getting to know 'em better. Working from my home has been fabulous for freedom... and absolutely horrific for my state of mind. I knew that some changes had to be made and it was time for me to make some adjustments to the status quo.
(Editor's note: yeah, yeah, this IS the most I've written about my personal life on the Tirade since that time I let the cat out of the bag about my cock fighting addiction.)
2010 marks the 10th anniversary of my graphic design career. I want to write another post celebrating the hilarious ups and downs of that journey, so jus' keep a look out. Through the past 10 years I've designed for print. Anything from newspapers and magazines to billboards and brochures, I've created it. Through the years, ink has been my most trusted friend and brutal enemy.
While I'll never fully stop designing for the print media, it's time to make the switch. The 'ole web train is coming... the engine is steaming and I'm tied down to the tracks. Web development is flying towards me like a speeding bullet and I left my bulletproof vest in the truck earlier when I went to check the mail.
So with a ticket for a new design career under my belt, I'm proudly making the announcement that I've taken on the role as Creative Director at a local web development company called Slamdot.
Please take this moment to stand up at your desk, wave your fists around like a baby grabbing at some plastic toy on a string, jump up and down a few times and fire off any awesome celebratory phrase that might come to mind. I know I sure as hell did.
Slamdot is a Knoxville-based company that's been rocking the web hosting and development world since 2005. Owner and Founder Sean Christman has been a wonderful teacher, mentor and friend, and I'm proud to join his team for some pretty amazing upcoming projects. You can visit the current website HERE... and HERE... but our full 100% changed & redesigned site will be going live soon.
We're also breaking new ground in the web development world by doing something that no other business has ever done. This handy copied & pasted press release will tell the tale:
-------------------------------------------
Slamdot Opens First-Ever Website Retail Store: The Slamdot Store
KNOXVILLE, TN. –Knoxville-based web developer Slamdot has unveiled a first-of-its-kind retail store selling professional web site packages, and offering in-store training and support.
“We think the Slamdot Store is a very dynamic idea, and consider the Knoxville location just the beginning,” said Slamdot founder, Sean Christman. “We’re making professional web sites affordable and streamlining the buying experience, and we think it’s an idea that can spread from our first store.”
Customers talk to a shopping assistant who helps them select the web site package that best fits their needs, and then check out in a traditional retail style environment.
Affordability and ease of purchase in a store setting are huge advantages, he said, “but what happens after that is just as important.”
Slamdot Opens First-Ever Website Retail Store: The Slamdot Store
KNOXVILLE, TN. –Knoxville-based web developer Slamdot has unveiled a first-of-its-kind retail store selling professional web site packages, and offering in-store training and support.
“We think the Slamdot Store is a very dynamic idea, and consider the Knoxville location just the beginning,” said Slamdot founder, Sean Christman. “We’re making professional web sites affordable and streamlining the buying experience, and we think it’s an idea that can spread from our first store.”
Customers talk to a shopping assistant who helps them select the web site package that best fits their needs, and then check out in a traditional retail style environment.
Affordability and ease of purchase in a store setting are huge advantages, he said, “but what happens after that is just as important.”
“The buying experience is just the beginning of the customer’s relationship with Slamdot,” said Christman, who recently earned the Young Entrepreneur of the Year Award from the Knoxville Chamber and accolades nationwide for the web hosting company’s innovative and painless web site management solutions. “It’s not enough to just stick a website in someone’s hands. You’ve got to back it up.”
“So once the sale is complete, we also handle the development of the site, work one-on-one with customers, and provide expertise all along the way,” he said. “Customers have told us that’s what they need. It frees them to get a great website up and running quickly, so they can concentrate on their core business.”
Customers also have opportunities to attend “SlamCamps,” which offer hands-on training on a variety of topics ranging from web hosting and email to social media and Internet marketing.
Slamdot’s exportable business model also includes in-store technical support, enabling customers to bring in their computer or mobile device and receive personalized, one-on-one assistance.
“It’s this thoughtful bundling of products, services and support that makes the Slamdot Store truly unique,” Christman said.
Completing the one-stop shopping idea, Slamdot also provides business-class web hosting starting at $11/month.
Slamdot is opening its first store at 108 South Gay Street in Knoxville, Tennessee, with ceremonies at 4:30 p.m. on Friday, December 4th.
“So once the sale is complete, we also handle the development of the site, work one-on-one with customers, and provide expertise all along the way,” he said. “Customers have told us that’s what they need. It frees them to get a great website up and running quickly, so they can concentrate on their core business.”
Customers also have opportunities to attend “SlamCamps,” which offer hands-on training on a variety of topics ranging from web hosting and email to social media and Internet marketing.
Slamdot’s exportable business model also includes in-store technical support, enabling customers to bring in their computer or mobile device and receive personalized, one-on-one assistance.
“It’s this thoughtful bundling of products, services and support that makes the Slamdot Store truly unique,” Christman said.
Completing the one-stop shopping idea, Slamdot also provides business-class web hosting starting at $11/month.
Slamdot is opening its first store at 108 South Gay Street in Knoxville, Tennessee, with ceremonies at 4:30 p.m. on Friday, December 4th.
-------------------------------------------
Besides gladly serving as a personal shopping assistant, I've done every square inch of design for the new downtown store. From the signage on the walls to the boxes that the web packages are sold in... as well as the websites themselves, you can find the McClane mark on the entire space. (And if you lick anything in the store, it'll taste just like me.)
I'll be handling all the custom design work for the new store as well. If a retail package isn't quite what you're looking for, that's where I'll come in. I can help you develop the website of your dreams, basically. And seriously.
However, if you want a website that can make you toast, avenge your father's murder, tame your horses or change the oil in your busted '78 chevy... you're going to have to probably wait a little while so we can get that stuff ironed out. I'm pretty sure they do that kind of thing in Japan all the time, so I'm pretty confident we can make that happen.
Tonight, December 4, 2009, the all-new Slamdot Store will have its massive grand opening in the heart of Downtown Knoxville. If anybody from Knoxville is downtown for First Friday, the Christmas Parade or a random road trip that went awry after turning the wrong way out of the Krystal parking lot... come on down and say hello!!!
Here are a few behind-the-scenes photos of the store and my new office. Don't tell the guys at the store that I posted these before our grand opening... if they ever found out, they might take away my bathroom privileges.
Here's me in the front of the store. Inside each of those boxes is an awesome website, ready for action.
Buying a website is just as easy as buying a new video game off the shelf.
The signage above the shelves displays the final cost of your site. Training, assistance and support are all included in the price with absolutely no hidden fees or charges for labor, etc. (Best deal ever, man.)
Looking down from the loft towards the front door.
In the loft. Where the magic happens.
Stairway to heaven, baby.
These are our transparent offices / consultation hot spots.
My office neighbor, Daniel Monday, doesn't mess around.
The sweet view of the back. Our awesome hang out room, kitchen and kung-fu training area.
The bottom line for my personal life is that I'm back where I've always needed to be: working in a living, breathing city and constantly meeting the awesome people who live here. (Yes, that even means you, crazy drunken homeless man who speaks in tongues and harasses women daily with a claw hammer.)
Hello again, downtown. We were together for nearly three years... we've been apart for a full year now... and now I'm back in your arms again, right where I belong. (Insert snuggling noises here with a soft rendition of George Michael's "Careless Whisper" in the background.)
I'm back. Come say hello!
-McClane
2 Comments:
Welcome to the team, Matt!
Very awesome, Matt! I am so proud of you and very happy for you! I hate working from home!
Post a Comment