Man, crazy day today, huh? I don't know where you are in the world right now, but there's some crazy things happening in Knoxville. (Seriously crazy.)
Surprise! University of Tennessee head football coach Lane Kiffin bails on Knoxville, takes a job across the country and solidifies himself as being one of the biggest dicks of the entire sports industry. To me, this is awesome. I have no idea if you know this, but I am not a fan of these UT guys.
I've always seen these UT people as pure comedy. It's always so interesting how sports—college football in particular—can really turn into a fantastic soap opera. The hilarity of this stuff never fails to entertain... exactly the way Young and the Restless entertains the housewives and super hot chicks of America. (Heads up, Lisa.)
Anyway, I've never loved this Kiffin guy, and that's no jive. From the first few games (and specifically press conferences) I thought this guy was Superintendent of the Shitface Schoolboard. The trash talking, piss-poor etiquette and rude cadence always offended me, mostly because Knoxville is where I live. I'm not even a Vols fan, but when a guy gets on National Television representing my city and simultaneously gets mentioned in Lil Wayne tracks for being a dick... I kinda feel like Knoxville is getting the shaft.
Anyway, today he made the announcement that he's bolting out of here, and apparently Knoxville has gone apeshit. Check out this fantastic picture of the acclaimed and infamous rock on UT's campus, for example.
Somebody blogged earlier about the crazy riots on campus and how the cops had to whip out the tear gas amongst flaming mattresses and Molotov cocktails, and that's something straight out of a Children of Men film. (Check these videos for a quick reference of the size of this thing:)
Facebook and Twitter have been in-sane tonight. Some of the best commentary of the night has come from random posts. Here's a few terrific ones for your viewing pleasure, copied and pasted in their glory:
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Pat Forde of ESPN on why USC chose Kiffin: "After DeRio, Jeff Fisher, Sarkisian, etc. turned the job down, they're pretty much down to the D-List of coaching options."
Confirmed by several UT players: as Lane was making the announcement to the team, they could hear Ed making calls in the back room to UT recruits telling them they have scholarships at USC. I would rather lose every game then have a snake like Kiffin coaching our boys.
heard they just tear gassed the students waiting on that POS Kiffin to leave the football complex and that Will Muschamp is choice #1 as next coach. Rumor he will accept. We could salvage this thing if we can keep Thompson, Kippy, and take Garner grom UGay. Oh yeah I hope Orgeron has a stroke from Red Bull. He text our early enrollees about 7pm tonight telling them to not go to class tomorrow & to go to USC
hopes the reporters told Lane just where they would like to shove their cameras..... 30 seconds of video my a**....... I say make the pirate a vol!!! Bring in Leach!
Lane Kiffin lives on Tooles Bend Road? Appropriate. Okay, I'm done. Goodnight!
My favorite quote from a pissed off Vol fan on Lane Kiffin's fan page: "May the fleas of a 1000 camels infest your underpants."
I hope Tiger banged Layla
Oh yes it is good to be a fan of a team that is not the Tennessee Volunteers. GO BLUE (MTSU and Michigan)
Maybe Tyler Smith & Nukeese Richardson will help Lane get out of town safely.
ESPN just showed his 1 min press conference. He said that he is leaving 14 months after his arrival and leaving a far better team than was here when he arrived. Bullshit Lane!
Vol fans...boy did we get screwed, hahahaha.
Thanks for pooping on my birthday Lane Kiffin
Gotta wonder about Kiffin's backup plan for all this mess. I hope he has like a super awesome A-Team style van that's like bulletproof with iron plates and bars for driving anywhere in the region. Or maybe like a robot clone that can go to the grocery store and take axe to the neck with no harm.
What a coincidence! WBIR interrupted The Biggest Loser for Kiffin's press conference! The two kinda go together!
Aw, shucks! I was looking forward to another lackluster season and a porous defense and dozens of secondary recruiting violations. Dangit.
Dear Lane Kiffin, We hate you. Love, The Vols.
this Kiffin news annoys me...maybe will be lucky enough to see his short career end at USC, or catch a stray bullet from a gang war, either one is fine with me...Traitor!..any ideas on a potential replacement?
And the Doucher of the year goes to... LANE KIFFIN!!! This message was brought to you by Dish Network
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Now THAT'S entertainment!
Anyway, I'm really glad that a guy who's been a poor representative of my city is finally setting sail. Later Kiff man, don't let the door hit ya on the way out, sucka.
Happy Wednesday fools!
-M
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